Tradition Three "The only requirement for A.A. membership is
a desire to stop drinking."
This Tradition is packed with meaning. For A.A. is
really saying to every serious drinker, "You are an A.A. member if you say so.
You can declare yourself in; nobody can keep you out. No matter who you are, no
matter how low you've gone, no matter how grave your emotional complications -
even your crimes - we still can't deny you A.A. We don't want to keep you out.
We aren't a bit afraid you'll harm us, never mind how twisted or violent you may
be. We just want to be sure that you get the same great chance for sobriety that
we've had. So you're an A.A. member the minute you declare yourself."
To establish this principle of membership took years of
harrowing experience. In our early time, nothing seemed so fragile, so easily
breakable as an A.A. group. Hardly an alcoholic we approached paid any
attention; most of those who did join us were like flickering candles in a
windstorm. Time after time, their uncertain flames blew out and couldn't be
relighted. Our unspoken, constant thought was "Which of us may be the next?"
A member gives us a vivid glimpse of those days. "At
one time," he says, "every A.A. group had many membership rules. Everybody was
scared witless that something or somebody would capsize the boat and dump us all
back into the drink. Our Foundation office* asked each group to send in its list
of `protective' regulations. The total list was a mile long. If all those rules
had been in effect everywhere, nobody could have possibly joined A.A. at all, so
great was the sum of our anxiety and fear.
"We were resolved to admit nobody to A.A. but that
hypothetical class of people we termed `pure alcoholics.' Except for their
guzzling, and the unfortunate results thereof, they could have no other
complications. so beggars, tramps, asylum inmates, prisoners, queers, plain
crackpots, and fallen women were definitely out. Yes sir, we'd cater only to
pure and respectable alcoholics! Any others would surely destroy us. Besides, if
we took in those odd ones, what would decent people say about us? We built a
fine-mesh fence right around A.A. "Maybe this sounds comical now. Maybe you
think we oldtimers were pretty intolerant. But I can tell you there was nothing
funny about the situation then. We were grim because we felt our lives and homes
were threatened, and that was no laughing matter. Intolerant, you say? Well, we
were frightened. Naturally, we began to act like most everybody does when
afraid. After all, isn't fear the true basis of intolerance? Yes, we were
intolerant."
How could we then guess that all those fears were to
prove groundless? How could we know that thousands of these sometimes
frightening people were to make astonishing recoveries and become our greatest
workers and intimate friends? Was it credible that A.A. was to have a divorce
rate far lower than average? Could we then foresee that troublesome people were
to become our principle teachers of patience and tolerance? Could any then
imagine a society which would include every conceivable kind of character, and
cut across every barrier of race, creed, politics, and language with ease?
Why did A.A. finally drop all its membership
regulations? Why did we leave it to each newcomer to decide himself whether he
was an alcoholic and whether he should join us? Why did we dare say, contrary to
the experience of society and government everywhere, that we would neither
punish nor deprive any A.A. of membership, believe anything, or conform to
anything?
The answer, now seen in Tradition Three, was simplicity
itself. At last experience taught us that to take away any alcoholic's full
chance was sometimes to pronounce his death sentence, and often to condemn him
to endless misery. Who dared to be judge, jury, and executioner of his own sick
brother?
As group after group saw these possibilities, they
finally abandoned all membership regulations. One dramatic experience after
another clinched this determination until it became our universal tradition.
Here are two examples:
On the A.A. calendar it was Year Two. In that time
nothing could be seen but two struggling, nameless groups of alcoholics trying
to hold their faces up to the light.
A newcomer appeared at one of these groups, knocked on
the door and asked to be let in. He talked frankly with that group's oldest
member. He soon proved that his was a desperate case, and that above all he
wanted to get well. "But," he asked, "will you let me join your group? Since I
am the victim of another addiction even worse stigmatized than alcoholism, you
may not want me among you. Or will you?"
There was the dilemma. What should the group do? The
oldest member summoned two others, and in confidence laid the explosive facts in
their laps. Said he, "Well, what about it? If we turn this man away, he'll soon
die. If we allow him in, only god knows what trouble he'll brew. What shall the
answer be - yes or no?"
At first the elders could look only at the objections.
"We deal," they said, "with alcoholics only. So went the discussion while the
newcomers fate hung in the balance. Then one of the three spoke in a very
different voice. "What we are really afraid of," he said, "is our reputation. We
are much more afraid of what people might say than the trouble this strange
alcoholic might bring. As we've been talking, five short words have been running
through my mind. Something keeps repeating to me, `What would the Master do?'"
Not another word was said. What more indeed could be said?"
Overjoyed, the newcomer plunged into Twelfth Step work.
Tirelessly he laid A.A.'s message before scores of people. Since this was a very
early group, those scores have since multiplied themselves into thousands. Never
did he trouble anyone with his other difficulty. A.A. had taken its first step
in the formation of Tradition Three.
Not long after the man with the double stigma knocked
for admission, A.A.'s other group received into its membership a salesman we
shall call Ed. A power driver, this one, and brash as any salesman could
possibly be. He had at least and idea a minute on how to improves A.A. These
ideas he sold to fellow members with the same burning enthusiasm with which he
distributed automobile polish. But he had one idea that wasn't so salable. Ed
was an atheist. His pet obsession was that A.A. could get along better without
its "God nonsense." He browbeat everybody, and everybody expected that he'd soon
get drunk - for at the time, you see, A.A. was on the pious side. There must be
a heavy penalty, it was thought, for blasphemy. Distressingly enough, Ed
proceeded to stay sober.
At length the time came for him to speak in a meeting.
We shivered, for we knew what was coming. He paid a fine tribute to the
Fellowship; he told how his family had been reunited; he extoled the virtue of
honesty; he recalled the joys of Twelfth Step work; and then he lowered the
boom. Cried Ed, "I can't stand this God stuff! It's a lot of malarkey for weak
folks. This group doesn't need it, and I won't have it! To hell with it!"
A great wave of outraged resentment engulfed the
meeting, sweeping every member to a single resolve: "Out he goes!"
The elders led Ed aside. They said firmly, "You can't
talk like this around here. You'll have to quit it or get out." With great
sarcasm Ed came back at them. "Now do tell! Is that so?" He reached over to a
bookshelf and took up a sheaf of papers. On top of them lay the foreword to the
book "Alcoholics Anonymous," then under preparation. He read aloud, "The only
requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking." Relentlessly, Ed
went on, "When you guys wrote that sentence, did you mean it, or didn't you?"
Dismayed, the elders looked at one another, for they
knew he had them cold. So Ed stayed. Ed not only stayed, he stayed sober - month
after month. The longer he kept dry, the louder he talked - against God. The
group was in anguish so deep that all fraternal charity had vanished. "When, oh
when," groaned members to one another, "will that guy get drunk?"
Quite a while later, Ed got a sales job which took him
out of town. At the end of a few days, the news came in. He'd sent a telegram
for money, and everybody knew what that meant! Then he got on the phone. In
those days, we'd go anywhere on a Twelfth Step job, no matter how unpromising.
But this time nobody stirred. "Leave him alone! Let him try it by himself for
once; maybe he'll learn a lesson!"
About two weeks later, Ed stole by night into an A.A.
member's house, and unknown to the family, went to bed. Daylight found the
master of the house and another friend drinking their morning coffee. A noise
was heard on the stairs. To their consternation, Ed appeared. A quizzical smile
on his lips, he said, "Have you fellows had your morning meditation?" They
quickly sensed that he was quite in earnest. In fragments, his story came out.
In a neighboring state, Ed had holed up in a cheap
hotel. After all his please for help had been rebuffed, these words rang in his
fevered mind. "They have deserted me. I have been deserted by my own kind. This
is the end . . . Nothing is left." As he tossed on his bed, his hand brushed the
bureau near by, touching a book. Opening the book, he read. It was a Gideon
Bible. Ed never confided any more of what he saw and felt in that hotel room. It
was the year 1938. He hasn't had a drink since.
Nowadays, when old timers who know Ed foregather, they
exclaim, "What if we had actually succeeded in throwing Ed out for blasphemy?
What would have happened to him and all the others he later helped?"
So the hand of Providence early gave us a sign that any
alcoholic is a member of our Society when he says so. *In 1954, the name of the
Alcoholic Foundation, Inc., was changed to the General Service Board of
Alcoholics Anonymous, Inc., and the Foundation office is now the General Service
Office.
|